Grumble grumble

Hey everybody! Come take the poll on my blog! After all the votes are in, I'll tell you why I posted this particular poll. Thanks guys!

Surrender......................

to the awesome cuteness that is Dorian. So, tonight Dorian learned a brand new word!!!! He learned "yucky"! He used to just make a sound like the end of the word yuck for yucky, but tonight he actually said it. He also learned "ewwww" very recently! Lucky me, I managed to get some great video of him saying both of his new words!!! Watch carefully at the end when I say "you're so sweet", I think he's trying to say "so sweet". Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!! He's too cute for words!!!!

Woohoo!!!

First official weigh in today! Ok, so I took my measurements and weighed myself. Here's the situation. I'm using the weight from the other day as my starting weight since I don't actually know what my weight was when I started this whole thing (that's probably a blessing in disguise-yikes). BUT, I will use the measurements from today as my starting measurements because this is the first time I've measured. Anyway, I'm not going to share any of my actual measurements or my weight with you guys. I am going to post my updates as to number of pounds/inches lost, though. I made a spreadsheet for myself (hmm, I seem to remember mentioning that I'm a tad obssessive) so I can have all my numbers at a glance. And being the paranoid freak that I am, I put it in a weird place on our computer and marked the folder as hidden just so Justin can't somehow stumble upon it one day. Anyhoo, so here's the news!!! I've lost 3 pounds since last weigh in!!! Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My next weigh in/measuring will be 2 weeks from today and I hope to have some good news to report then also! More later on some crafty endeavors!

A toast....

to seeing amazing movies that you wouldn't mind watching again right after watching it the first time. Ok, so we went to see The Dark Knight last night and whoa. It was AMAZING. This may be the first time that I've seen a movie that lives up to every bit of the hype. First off, the cast is unbelievable. Christian Bale, Michael Caine, Morgan Freeman, Gary Oldman, Heath Ledger.....you get where I'm going with this. Secondly, the action scenes were thrilling without being ridiculous. Thirdly, Heath Ledger's rendition of The Joker was impeccable. Seriously, if I hadn't know it was Heath Ledger under the makeup, I would have been really hard pressed to name the actor playing him. He literally became that character. He creeped me out!!! He was disgusting, scary, evil, yet somehow still likeable, if for no other reason than that he was such a purely diabolical villain. No redeeming qualities, no sad little boy behind the malice, no rhyme or reason behind his insanity. Just 100% villain. I think that he is completely deserving of a posthumous Oscar based on his performance. It makes me even sadder about his death than I was before. The ability and potential that he showed in this film just make it all the more tragic that he died at such a young age. This performance really demonstrated where he could have gone in his career. And Christian Bale shows once again that he is one of the most underrated actors in Hollywood. He delivers waaay beyond any other actor that's taken on the role of Batman. He portrays perfectly the kind of dark, tortured superhero and it's definitely lacking the corny aspect that's present in most of the other superhero movies (think SpiderMan, The Hulk, X-Men, etc). So, to wrap it up, go see The Dark Knight!!!! It's so worth it!!! Also, I have to add that one of the trailers that came on before the movie was for a movie called Terminator Salvation which is, you guessed it, another film in the Terminator franchise. However, what's different about this one? Christian Bale stars as the grown up John Connor!!!!!!! Say what????!!!! Yes, you read that right. If he does for the Terminator franchise what he's done for the Batman franchise, prepare for a dose of awesome.

Awwwwww

Dorian said "night night" for the first time last night. I was about to put him in his swing (don't ask about our bedtime routine--long story) and, like every night, I said "Tell Daddy night night", which he never actually does. It's just one of those things that parents do with babies. Anyway, this time he actually SAID IT!! And as he was saying it, he leaned over for a kiss from Justin. Eeeeeeeee!!! It was heart-melting!

Also, more weirdness from Sebastian. Yesterday he decided to try and pour some milk for himself by himself. He got it poured without incident (miraculous I tell you!) and said, "Mom, I poured the milk by myself and I didn't even spill a drop!" and I said "Awesome! Good job!" and he goes "Mom, I'm gonna be normal today." and I said "Ha! Sebastian, you're so funny!" because I thought it was a funny thing for him to say. He seemed to think I meant that it was funny because it was highly unlikely because then he said "Seriously Mom. I'm really gonna be normal today." and I just lost it. Obviously Sebastian being normal go together like oil and water so his prophecy was destined to remain unfulfilled. But it was funny!

The Ugly Truth

Ok, so today sucks. We finally got a scale last night. It was entirely my plan to wait until Monday to weigh so that I could do it up right. In the morning, after peeing, no clothes. Also, I was going to measure at the same time. But, well.......there it was and I couldn't resist. Well. I can't tell you the string of curse words that ran through my head. Actually, I could tell you but my mom would read it and be very offended, so I won't. Anyway, here's the long and short (and fat) of it. I weigh 12 pounds more than I did the last time I weighed 15 months ago. I was sure that I had gained weight since then. However, I was also sure that if I did the eating well thing for a month and then weighed, I'd be back at or below that weight by the time I weighed. But, no. Hell no. So, fine, I swallowed the shame and disappointment and I went on about my business, eating my healthy dinner of grilled mahi mahi, 4 grilled shrimp, and some grilled asparagus. I even went on my stupid walk and accomplished my goal of jogging for part of it. After that, I was sitting on our front porch, chugging some water and waiting till I cooled off somewhat. Mostly because every time I walk in the house after my walk, Dorian is like a magnet to my metal and has to get all up on me and not budge. Warm, cuddly baby is usually excellent, but not when I feel like I'm going to spontaneously combust. Anyway, there I was sitting outside and Justin came outside to smoke. He announces that he had just weighed himself and he gave me the number. HOLY SHIT. That's exactly what popped into my brain. I'm not going to give exact numbers because he might read this and then figure out what I weigh. In true female fashion, I have refused to tell him my weight or pants size. Anyhoo, let's just say that I weigh more than he does. Like, by a substantial amount. I cannot even describe the crushing discouragement that settled down on me at that moment. I held it in and went on inside. I held it together for a while and then I just went in our room and laid down and cried. Justin came in and asked what was wrong and I tried to explain it to him, but he just doesn't get it. He'll never get it. He's a guy, first of all. Secondly, he's never had a weight problem. Thirdly, even if he had a weight problem, there wouldn't be this shameful stigma attached to it like there is for women. Fourthly, he has no concept of how hard it is to try and lose weight because he doesn't have to try. Since we've been doing the healthy thing, I guarantee you that he's lost 10 lbs. And he doesn't exercise. He still eats tacos and hamburgers and whatnot for lunch sometimes. He still eats Mint Dibs at 11pm. He still has soda sometimes and eats white bread. And YET, he will lose weight at a rapid pace while I freaking struggle along, barely making a dent. He thinks I'm mad at him about that, but I'm not. It's just so unbelievably frustrating. See, here's the thing. I'm not sad because I'm not at my goal weight yet. My goal weight is quite a ways off. I think a healthy and acceptable weight for me is about 70 lbs away, so I know that it's gonna be a long hard trek. The thing is, I'm just anxious to get to a point where I even halfway like what I see in the mirror. And that seemed far enough off yesterday morning. But, after last night, it seems almost impossible. It just sucks SO MUCH to be doing all the right things and trying so hard, only to still be completely disgusted by yourself and the way you look. I'd love to be at a place where bathing doesn't make me want to vomit. Anyway. Sorry, but posting about anything crafty wasn't in me. I just don't have the heart today.

It's been a few days....

Even though there's not much to talk about, I figured I'd update. I've been doing totally great with the healthy living. Haven't eaten anything bad, exercised 6 times in a week like I vowed. However, my exercise week starts on Monday and here's how it went:

Monday: Billy Blanks Boot Camp Basic Training

Tuesday: Yoga

Wednesday: Belly Dancing

Thursday: Random Cardio Routine from FitTV

Friday: Yoga

Saturday: REST DAY (yay!)

Sunday: Walked a mile, pushing Dorian in the stroller


Ok, so I've made some decisions about my fitness routine. I don't like doing the indoor workouts. I feel confined and bored and frankly, I dread it every morning. So I went walking last night when it was almost dark. We live on a cul de sac that's exactly 1/10 of a mile from our house to the start of the road. Our house is the last house on the street. So, I just went from our house to the start of the road and then back 5 times, which equals a mile. I pushed the baby in the stroller, which he enjoyed, even though it was killing me. I found that I liked it a lot more than doing the indoor stuff, though. I borrowed Justin's iPod and blasted Dashboard Confessional the whole time, and I have to say, I still had some energy left when I quit. However, I do like doing the yoga stuff too. So I'm thinking I'll do yoga in the morning and then walk at night. Sounds like a plan to me. The thing I like about yoga is how much it's limbering me up already, even though I've only done 2 sessions of it. I love the thought that at some time in the future, I'll be able to sit down with my legs spread and touch my forehead to the floor. I don't know why that sounds so awesome, but it does. Just think, I'll be 30 soon, and I'll be in better shape than I've ever been. As my cousin Penny would say, WOO and HOO. Couple of sad notes. One is that it took me 22 minutes to walk that mile. Yikes. Back in the day, when I used to work out, I could do 1.89 miles in 20 minutes. So, it took me about twice as long to walk it. But, hey, it's a start, right? The second is that we still haven't gotten a scale so I have no idea how much (if any) weight I've lost or what my starting weight was. BUT, I'm going to measure myself today and at least I'll have those numbers to work with until we get a scale at the end of this week.

On the crafty front, I'm working on the many washcloths for my girl, Kathy. We traded for something that I had her make for Sebastian's teachers and on my end, I have to make 15 washcloths. I'm diligently knitting away on those. Also, I'm making Sebastian a shirt today. It's based on a funny something he said and it should be great. Here's how that conversation went.

Sebastian: When I grow up, I wanna be a ninja.

Me: Ok.

Bethany: Ninjas aren't for real.

Me: Yes they are.

Sebastian: Yes they are.

Bethany: No, they're not. They're just on movies.

Me: No. They're real.

Bethany: No, they're not.

Me: Fine, let's call your dad and we'll ask him.

(Side note. Justin lived in Japan when he was little (for a couple years, till he was 4) so the kids think he's the ultimate authority on anything Asian. For instance, they think it's logical to assume that he can speak Chinese because he lived in Japan.)

Justin: Hello?

Me: Hey, Sebastian was just telling me that he wants to be a ninja when he grows up and Bethany says they aren't real, but Sebastian and I say they are. Tell her they're real.

Justin: Yes, they're real. They actually have one in Nashville that teaches classes. Tell Sebastian that if that's what he wants to be when he grows up, that's fine.

Me: Ok, bye! See, Bethany, your dad says they're real and they have one in Nashville. Sebastian, daddy said that if that's what you want to be when you grow up, it's fine.

Sebastian: Cool!!!! That means I can be Jafanese (this is how he says Japanese)!!!

Me: Uh, no. You'll still just be you. You won't turn Japanese if you become a ninja.

Sebastian: Aw man!!! But I want to be Jafanese!

Me: Sorry Charlie.

Sebastian: Well, I guess I could just travel to Japan. Maybe dad would wanna come with me.


OMG. Seriously, he is so freaking funny. This conversation is great, on several levels.

1) Sebastian very seriously thought it out and decided on ninja as his future profession.

2) Justin actually said that if it's what he wants to be, it's fine. The concept of being encouraging is not always very clear to him, so I think it's funny/sweet that he said that.

3) Sebastian actually thought that being a ninja would also make him "Jafanese".

4) Sebastian really and truly used the words "I guess I could just travel to Japan". Ha! Like, why wouldn't he just say "go to Japan"?

5) Sebastian says Japan perfectly, but still thinks it's Jafanese instead of Japanese.

Anyway, yeah, the shirt will be based on that conversation. I should have pictures to show tomorrow. For now, I'm off to do yoga!

Sweet Lord

I did my first bit of exercising today. Holy crap. First, let me say that I haven't exercised since about the 3rd month of my pregnancy with Dorian. So, that's what? 2 months shy of 2 years ago? Yeah........ So, anyway, I did the Billy Blanks Boot Camp Basic Training and let me tell you, it kicked my ass. It's 55 minutes long!!!!! I did the whole thing. I had to take about 5 breaks, I drank a whole 20 oz bottle of water, and I came within a hair's breadth of vomiting when I was done, but I did the whole thing. I had to lay on the floor with a wet rag over my face for roughly 30 minutes after I finished. However, while I was doing it, Bethany was in here and she told me on at least 3 separate occasions "Mama, you're doing really good. I'm proud of you." and that was serious motivation. Not to mention how very sweet it was for her to say that. She's such a sensitive little girl! Meanwhile, I'm going to dvr some episodes of Namaste Yoga on FitTV every night and I'm going to alternate the Boot Camp stuff with yoga. I'm going to shoot for working out 6 days a week. So, 3 days of Boot Camp and 3 days of yoga. Blah. I really don't like working out. I've said a million times that if I could just pick one thing or the other (eating well OR exercising), I wouldn't have a problem with that, but doing BOTH of them just sucks. Maybe I'll get to that place where exercising becomes invigorating and empowering. I doubt it, but hey, stranger things have happened. As incentive, I bought a really cute shirt that won't fit me right now, but will at some point. I'm keeping that shirt in my sights and I'll be able to wear it sometime. Here's what I looked like after I finished exercising:



I don't know who that guy is, but I googled "passed out" on google images and that's the only picture that wasn't somebody getting colored on or cool whipped or something while they were passed out drunk. Anyway, what else? Oh yeah, I finished a project! I made this cool composite image using letter that I found by using the letters of our last name as search terms on Photobucket. So, most of you know that our last name is H*****, but for those of you who don't, our last name is H*****. I would just do a search for "the letter h", "the letter r", etc. Then, I used Photoshop to put them all together and resize them to be the same height. I used the program at blockposters.com, which separates any image into individual sheets and then compiles the whole thing into a PDF file that you can download FOR FREE. This is very handy information because it's obviously WAY cheaper to have a few regular size sheets printed than it is to have a giant poster printed. After that, I emailed the file to Staples Copy Center and had it printed on card stock, in color, for less than $7. I used an old piece of cardboard that we had floating around here and adhered each sheet to the cardboard using spray adhesive. I cut the cardboard to size and then used mounting tape on back of the cardboard to hang it on the wall. Here's how it turned out!!

The whole thing:



Close up:



Another close up:



With the tv for scale. The tv is 35 inches wide and the last name thing is 49 1/2 inches wide by 10 inches tall:



I really love how it turned out! And it was super cheap too. Can't beat that. Till next time people!

Funny Stuff Sebastian Says

Know how in kid's action stuff there's always something about _______ of fury? Like "fists of fury" or "kick of fury" or whatever? Well, apparently Sebastian thinks it's "theory" instead of "fury", so today he was trying to snap Bethany with Dorian's little froggy blanket and he yelled out "FEEL MY BLANKET OF THEORY!!!!!!!!!!!!". Heeheeeheeeheeheee!!!

Lots of Random Ramblings

Ok, so some of my family was here for the weekend! We had SO much fun!! My mom, my sister, and my niece and nephew all came to visit. They got here in the wee hours of the morning Friday and left about an hour ago. It was a short visit, but a really good one! We went to Rock Island and to see the fireworks that they do at the fairgrounds here every year for the 4th. Here are some pictures my sister took while we were out and about that day! First, the ones from Rock Island. We got rained out after we had been there for less than an hour and then when we were leaving, some guy in the parking lot rear-ended mine and Justin's back bumper. Typical of our attempts to complete any sort of out of the house activity. There was a tiny hole in our rear taillight, but Justin was just like "eh, I don't care", so we left.

Anyway, here are some of the falls at Rock Island:





Gorgeous, no?

Bethany and Julian acting crazy:



Sebastian, Julian, and Sophia:



Dorian, looking highly annoyed:



In both of those pictures he's making SUCH a Sebastian face, I can't even believe it. He was annoyed because we were trying to finish eating. We were gonna get him out so he could play when we were done, but pretty much right as we finished, it started raining.

Here's Sophia, getting herself muddy:



Here's another one of Sophia, getting in trouble because she wouldn't get out when it started raining:



Now, here are some really pretty ones of the fireworks from later that night!








Ok, look how insanely excited Sophia and Sebastian got about the fireworks. It was SO funny!





Then, last night, we went to the drive in and watched some awesome movies. It was a triple feature, but I fell asleep about 30 minutes into the second one. They played Wall*E, Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian, and The Incredible Hulk. Me, Justin, Sebastian, and Dorian left after the 2nd movie and Bethany stayed behind with my mom, Phoebe, Sophia, and Julian to watch the 3rd movie. We had a really great time all weekend! They left today and we all cried. I get really lonely for my family and I was SO glad to see them. The best thing is that Julian gets to stay for 2 weeks!!! Yay!!!!!!!

Ok, update on Operation Unfat. I've decided that I'm not gonna post my food/water intake every day. It gets a little hectic at el Casa de Mequet sometimes and I don't have time to do it every day. But I have absolutely stayed on track!!!! Yesssss!!! With all the activity and my family being here, we've eaten out 4 times in the last several days and I've eaten well every time! We went to Chili's where I got a salad w/fat free ranch dressing and the guiltless chicken sandwich and water to drink. Then, we had Subway where I got a turkey sandwich on wheat with mustard, no cheese, and lots of veggies. No chips! And water to drink! Then we went to eat Japanese and I just ate edamame and 2 sushi long rolls. Yum!!! Water to drink, of course. Lastly, we went to McDonald's and I managed to resist the siren song of the fries and I had the Premium Asian Salad w/low fat sesame ginger dressing and no chicken, and the snack size fruit and yogurt parfait. It was surprisingly realllllly good (that dressing was sooo good) and filling!! So yay for me! Also, while we were at the movies, I only had an apple and some rice cakes. Woohoo!!! I made it through the popcorn/candy/fried food gauntlet. I'm going to post an update every week about how I've been doing whether I've avoided pitfalls, had a temporary lapse, etc. I'm also starting my exercise routine tomorrow (ouch) and will let you know how that goes. As soon as we get a scale, I'm going to weigh myself and I'll be able to fill you in on my weight loss once I start doing a biweekly weigh in. So, that's all the update for now!!! I hope all of you had a wonderfully exciting 4th!!!